What do you think about when you go into a negotiation—whether it is a business deal, a house purchase, or a raise? Is the goal to “win at all costs?” Too often, I deal with clients (and others) who look at negotiations as having a winner and a loser. To me, that is wrong.
A negotiation should always have a win-win outcome. If it doesn’t, there should be no deal. Recently, when I was delivering a workshop on negotiation, I showcased Seven Steps to a Successful Negotiation.
- Know going in that it is a win-win or not at all. That might mean you have to re-adjust your thinking. Think about being a solution provider. You know what you want, and hopefully, you know what they want. How can you ensure that both parties get what they want or as close to it as possible?
- Understand who/what you are negotiating with/about. Make sure you learn as much as you can about what the other folks need. Then you can problem solve. Listen to them, talk, and discuss before you negotiate. The better you understand their situation, the better chance that you will find solutions.
- Know where you stand. What is your BATNA (Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement)? Where do you draw the line, such as when buying a house—what is the most you will pay? You need to have a BATNA to make sure it does not get too emotional or out-of-hand.
- If it becomes emotional, if there are arguments, or anger, or such—step away. It is far better to break for an hour, a day, or a week and come back to the table in a different frame of mind than to continue negotiating and say something you will regret.
- Think beyond the immediate need. It is important to look long term. If you look at the negotiation as a one-time transactional deal, there won’t be a win-win scenario. If you look at it as a relationship-type deal, then you can look for win-win scenarios. As I have always said, it is all about the relationship—and that includes during the negotiation and the outcome.
- Make sure only the key stakeholders and negotiators are there. A roomful of people with too much input and interference will sabotage your win-win approach to negotiating. You can always bring the draft agreement back to the “masses” to negotiate internally as well, but when negotiating with the other party, keep it as uncomplicated as possible. Keep the masses out!
- Everyone has read about avoiding negotiating in the media. The same goes for email, social media, and other forms of communication. It should either be face-to-face in the same room, or on a phone (or Skype). Don’t try to negotiate by email or other forms of electronic communication. Make it human. Make it live. Then you can make it a win-win.
Let me know if you think I have missed anything that is critical in securing a win-win deal.
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