Three weeks ago in the Tuesday Morning Commentary, I suggested that we each “make a point to say something positive to a peer at work (client or staff) three times each day and also three times each day at home to a family member or friend. That is six times each day for seven days— 42 positive comments in a week.”
As I said, it has been three weeks. Were you able to do it? Did you quit after a week? Did you quit after a day? I can tell you I did try this… sort of. I tried really hard for a couple of days, making sure I said something positive to a professional peer (team member, supplier, client, or prospect) three times each day, then the same on a personal level with family and friends. It was tough, but I kept at it. I can truthfully tell you a few things.
- I ended up dropping it down to making sure I said something positive to a business peer or personal relationship three times a day. That meant three versus six comments a day.
- I have been managing this since September 7 and hope to keep doing it and making it a habit. I like the feeling that comes with it!
- I added a reminder to pop up daily in my Outlook tasks on my computer so that I can build the habit process.
- I also have my phone remind me each day to do it (typically at a time when I am away from the office and computer).
- Often this started a conversation that resulted in me helping them on something (which felt rewarding) or it resulted in them helping me on something. It was a conversation starter.
The outcome though, even the way I bastardized the task, was really rewarding. I felt good each day for what I had done. But even more importantly, I saw people smile when I made that comment face to face. Or I could hear them smile if it was on the phone. I usually got a “thank you—I really appreciate that” back when I emailed them or on LinkedIn. I know it affected them, which in turn, affected me.
So I went a little further. I thought, “How else can I ‘do good?’” Here are five ideas (mine and others).
- Anytime you interact with another person, professionally or personally, ask yourself “How can I help this person.” It truly makes a difference for you, your attitude, and of course, them!
- Always be yourself! Don’t fake it to pretend you are someone you are not. (Unless, of course, you are a self-centred, self-absorbed person, then heck… please act like someone else… but odds are you are not reading this anyway or don’t see yourself in that light!).
- If you have a peer who is working on deadline or a spouse/partner/child who is trying to get something accomplished in their busy life, find a way to help them meet that deadline.
- If you really want to get someone’s attention and make them happy, just ask them a question they want to answer. I know if I want to get my 11-year-old daughter’s attention, I can just ask her a question about Harry Potter and I will have her full attention! It really works!
- I really like this one: Don’t try to teach a starving person how to fish. Feed them the fish first. Then teach them how to fish when the pressure/hunger is gone!
Let me know how you did with our experiment. Also, let me know how you have or can “do good.” Feel free to post it on our blog, share it on LinkedIn, or Twitter or send me a direct email.
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